Getting Stoned

You would think that having a cute, nubile, young Vietnamese lady dancing on your buttocks would be somewhat erotic! Personally, I found it hilarious as all I could keep thinking was "if only the boys could see me now"!!!

What better way to unwind after an arduous day trip than have a hot stone massage? I didn't quite know what it entailed either, but herself suggested it and I reluctantly agreed! For the princely sum of about €8, I got an 80 minutes full body massage. I wasn't quite sure whose full body this entailed for quite some time as she used her feet, shins, knees, hands, elbows and forearms to, err, do her thing. And before you pervs lose the run of yourselves, this was all above board (although she did do the legs as well!) and no, she did not say "me love you long time". The closest she came was "if it's too hot, you tell me". Quite!

At times it was wonderful and at times it was like being in the Hanoi Hilton, as she kneaded, stomped, cracked and singed her way around the Reilly bod! Those stones were indeed hot, but I figured it was less painful than waxing!! In fact, at one stage, my hirsuteness was the cause of some merriment. There was about 8 tables in the darkened room and herself was getting treated on the next slab. I didn't know (obviously) what the masseuses were saying to each other as "my girl" worked on my hand/arm, but it wasn't difficult to guess. Although they cover your head, I obviously did my best to peek out at every opportunity. My girl got her mate to come over and check out the gorrilla on her table. Cue much giggling, including from me. She then asked me where I was from, to which I replied "the jungle"!

As she finished my second leg, I began to wish I was an octopus, but unfortunately all good things must come to an end. A great end to an eventful day though!